Habit vs Work

"Susannah Wesley was the mother of 19 children, including John and Charles Wesley. Through much adversity, she dedicated her life to instilling a sense of Christian Destiny into each of her children. Her children went on to change the world."

Here are 16 rules she laid down in her home.

1. Eating between meals not allowed.
2. As children they are to be in bed by 8 p.m.
3. They are required to take medicine without complaining.
4. Subdue self- will in a child, and those working together with God to save the child's soul.
5. To teach a child to pray as soon as he can speak.
6. Require all to be still during Family Worship.
7. Give them nothing that they cry for, and only that when asked for politely.
8. To prevent lying, punish no fault which is first confessed and repented of.
9. Never allow a sinful act to go unpunished.
10. Never punish a child twice for a single offense.
11. Comment and reward good behavior.
12. Any attempt to please, even if poorly performed, should be commended.
13. Preserve property rights, even in smallest matters.
14. Strictly observe all promises.
15. Require no daughter to work before she can read well.
16. Teach children to fear the rod.

These all seem pretty reasonable to me, but one, I admit, threw me a bit. Number 15! "Require no daughter to work before she can read well." I found this very interesting. I have to wonder a couple of things: Exactly when did she teach her daughters to read, and exactly what did she consider "work". My own four year old daughter is busily learning her phonics and writing skills and doing quite well at it. She loves her Five in a Row, when we do it, and she loves books. Period. I'm sure she's on her way to reading, but I'm not sure I can name the date for liftoff.

However, she also does what I consider "work". She makes her bed. She picks up her own messes. She helps dust and put away dishes (silver & plastics). She puts away her laundry. Would Susannah Wesley consider these things work? Or habit? Do we forget that good habit is often about stewardship and "work" may be more of things we'd hire out if we were filthy stinkin' rich? Like milking cows...if we had cows. Or sewing clothes, instead of buying them?

Sometimes I feel guilty for making my kids do their "helps"--what we call chores--when they have an opportunity to play. Especially if it's a beautiful day, or with a dear friend. Yet I realize I'm not helping them to develop the habit of order, responsibility, etc., if I allow them to shirk these "duties" to self in order to run in the sun.

Today, for example, I let them go out to play. I knew I wouldn't call them back till almost dinner time and figured I'd have a fight on my hands to get them back into "take care of your business" mode. Fortunately, they were both so appreciative of the time out that they acquiesced quite easily and finished their helps. I breathed a huge sigh of relief and figured that once again we should talk about how if no huge mess is made and left, there is no huge mess to fix. I believe they are starting to understand.

So now I'm working on rule #2--"As children they are to be in bed by 8pm." I'm pretty sure Wesley's children must've "grown up" around the age of 7! (At least according to my 8 year old whom I can't seem to convince he's tired until 9pm). Then again, there's that dratted daylight savings thing that has us all messed up! What time is it really anyway??

So...a very thought provoking list. What's your take on it?